We’re tough, heh or so we believe,
We can have abuses hurling at us and we wouldn’t flinch,
Be called a “Bitch!”, and nothing…
May be we even enjoy them, revel in them,
But some words bring out the worst in us,
They have us barking like mad dogs,
A condescending tone from those we love,
And we retaliate with anger,
We retaliate from inside our fortresses,
We tell them how we wouldn’t tolerate their inequities,
All the while crumbling.
All the while grieving,
Because we’re hurt beyond repair,
Left bruised and battered,
We mask our grief with anger,
Every harsh word cuts through us, but we pretend like we’re wearing a shield that no words can dent, nor scratch…
Funny thing is, anger can be released In a fleeting moment.
But we carry hurt in our chest, and ever so often we feel it, as we hear the rhythm of our heart beat.
Dum Dum Dum Dum
Dum Dum Dum Dum
Dum Dum Dum Dum Dum… Dum… Dum…
Do you feel it?
I know I do.
You smell of memories,
And when I’m with you,
The scent of sadness permeates the air,
Leaving me gasping for breath.
You smell of yearning,
You smell of lust,
You smell of longing,
You smell of thirst.
Darling, you smell of me.
You think I’m foolish,
I do not comprehend…
The things that transpire behind my back.
Let me tell you this,
But it’s good to be foolish,
Than to be wise.
For this world sees not with kindness
On those who fight,
Test of our patience.
Let me be stupid,
And away from all the games you play.
You, who claim to be mine.
I seek not your approval.
I seek not your love.
I seek the stupidity of an infamous fool.
Slowly fading, like the setting sun.
Do you belong to some,
Or to none?
Music drifts further away,
It’s the way of this world.
Never to stay,
Are you watching me smile,
turn away, let me cry a while.
Hold me in your arms,
When I’m calm.
I won’t cry, I promise you,
Please let me be
The one you go to
I’ll listen as you speak,
your secrets keep
Just one small promise I seek
You’ll say goodbye
Every time you leave.
She staggered through the desert, not stopping for breath, or water.
She recognized that the only way to conquer fear is to saunter on.
And so she did.
She held her anguish close to her bosom
A mother looking over her nursling
Glancing at it through the fissure
She wanted to ascertain her own desolation
It gave her courage.
You see, that’s how she was reminded of her mission, her machination, her need and her want.
Having walked on for miles, she lost all strength.
But she reminded herself, time and again, to not lose her will.
There’s some formidable power in misery that makes us do crazy things,
And do them well!
Hope began to lose its grip.
Because there was nothing but the vast desert, the sand, as far as the eye could see.
She began to cry until her tears ran dry and the sky put on its dark cloak.
It was only by the end of her journey that she began to run.
She could finally see the gallows.
Surrounded by voices from her past
Regret, shame, guilt, selfishness, greed, intemperance, love, care, tenderness were bawling their displeasure in the open.
She ran to her fate
Embraced it like it was her lover
Kissing it with a fierce passion
It was her time to bid adieu
And she did
With a beauteous smile
Now that’s a goodbye!
I wish so much for you to go, and grow and be.
I wish so much for you to leave.
But somehow, somewhere it’s difficult to say.
It has been difficult to feel.
The possibility of a together tomorrow is tempting.
It’s tempting because somehow I know It’s unattainable.
And I’m OK with it being so.
And yet, it’s difficult to see it happen.
I’ve wished too much lately,
But here are a few more,
You see it doesn’t hurt to dream.
So I wish,
I wish, that when the rain pours down on your face, you miss me,
When the same sun shines upon your frame, you miss me,
When the same moon kisses you under the night sky, you miss me,
When morning comes, you smile, knowing I miss you.
When the night puts on its armor you let down your guard and you miss me.
Is that too much to ask?
I think it is.
You see, no one said love would be easy.
Why mask what hides on your skin? A puzzle of a chaotic struggle, You call that love?
I call that life. Endless struggle. Art made of scars. Red with blood, honey, black with sorrow.
I’ll come for you oh my friend, with kneaded bread and sweetest wine. You’ve suffered enough in these places so cold.
I’ll sit with you. Exchanging silence for love. Is that enough?
It’s enough, if I can watch you lie in embrace with the warm hay and a fire to tend to you.
So then come, my friend. Let’s meet under the stars. Like old times. Like forgotten times. Let’s live again. Without fear.
Let’s taste grass, fall off a hill. Snow kissed cheeks and let rivers be so still.
Let’s play games for two. And laugh mindlessly. Let’s just be, you and me. The world can melt for now, while we watch.
Let’s hide behind trees and lie through the sands, run along the daffodils, let this madness creep for our hearts it fills.
And you words, they drill. Like ink on my skin. They leave a beautiful imprint on my heart.
I’m not here to stay, mark my ways with dagger on willow. Promise me, you’ll stay so glee, never look back or down below.
I can’t promise you glee. But I promise to smile even if warmth flows down my cheeks.
~ By Varun Chakravarty & Mitchelle Rozario Jansen
Checkout Varun’s other works on http://stateofmaroon.wordpress.com/
Whiskey was more than a word to her,
Much more than a drink.
It was the fragrance of love that once was.
It was the scar running across her cheek,
Her Pandora’s box of memories unheard off.
For year and years she wrapped around her the shadow of hope, of lust she reeked.
It was her own little secret to keep.
How she let her tears run dry, with every sip of whiskey.
My 16th Contribution to NaPoWriMo.
The challenge was – Day 18
You stomp out, whimper and cry, you bleed, bleed again,
You incite the venom, the poison, your soul so despises.
You sing so sweet, so melodious, of heartache and pain,
Yet hate you welcome, your brothers come home after ages?
You seek the new, the old you discard and slain,
It’s easy a bargain to make, to burn the ashes
Of our past glories to relive the agony and smile,
To hurt and curse, yet experience little happiness for awhile.
This is my sixth contribution towards the NaPoWriMo project. My humble attempt at creating something on the lines of Ottava Rima an Italian form of poetry.