I Bleed Words Sometimes

NaPoWriMo

It Takes Nothing

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It takes nothing…

It takes nothing for me to lose myself in you,

It takes nothing for me to melt away in your hold,

It takes nothing for me to be mesmerised by your sweet, velvet voice,

It takes nothing.

It takes nothing for me to go from loving you to despising your every breath,

It takes nothing for me to go from having you as my universe to shredding it to pieces,

It takes nothing for me to go from worshiping you to hating your every goddamn word,

It takes nothing.

You see… my love,

It takes nothing for me to go from being overjoyed by this life to being miserable and wanting it to end.

It really takes nothing.

I danced with joy in the rain today and then it saddened me.

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Detached

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I feel distant,
Removed,
As though, I do not belong.
Worse, I never did!

Love shouldn’t feel like that, should it?
Is it me running away?
Or are the waves receding?
I’m left utterly despondent.

I fear abandonment.
I fear helplessness.
I fear being me.
I fear.
And fear makes us do all sorts of crazy things.


Foolish

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You think I’m foolish,
I do not comprehend…
The things that transpire behind my back.

Let me tell you this,
I know,
I understand.
But it’s good to be foolish,
Than to be wise.
For this world sees not with kindness
On those who fight,

Sadistic ways.
Test of our patience.

Let me be stupid,
Alone.
And away from all the games you play.
You, who claim to be mine.

I seek not your approval.
I seek not your love.
I seek the stupidity of an infamous fool.


Sorrow In A Cave

Nan Goldin.

The rebellion of the sorrow in a cave, temptress on walls and a blade to succumb too.

Let’s drill deep, further seep, into the shell. So safe so dark so at home why won’t the edges blur? Why won’t the world melt?

Scratches along the walls, the wolf behind this cage. How shallow seems the sand and how horridly the edges peel away.

You can’t hear him howling, nor can you feel his pain. You can only stare at the ferocious creature. So tamed by his own rage.

Writhing in my own monstrosity, I envelope in the arms of heartache, Fuming I curl helpless, bleeding on my own page.

The wolf peering at me through the mirror. Is it me I should be afraid of? Or is it the human face that hides the monster?

Stalk slow, Die slow. A tyrant stirs, Resilient every feeling so crippled. It’s my wake, your memory and the their ripples. . .

So engulfed in your wrath that you spill from your bones. Blood to dry your tears. Hope to slaughter love. Laugh you sinner.

Jeer while you can, the tides may turn and the caves may light up. Hope lies in shadows of fears, dare to love and fear to breathe

Blithering wind. Scorching warmth. Are you not frightened of the agonizing, terrorizing nothingness? Your soul withers.

My soul withers where wombs lay bare, as pure as sin and half as fair. Stones unturned and sorrow I’ve had my share.

Yet I smile with my life laid bare. At your feet. Where you kick and curse. Sweet.

I scream everything down, the caves painted grey and love burnt for warmth. Hide…hide…hide.

Reality Eve Arnold.

~ By Varun Chakravarty & Mitchelle Rozario Jansen

Checkout Varun’s other works on http://stateofmaroon.wordpress.com/


Now what?

Tim Walker

 

Now what?

Should I just let the door CLOSE, and shut out the voices?

Or should I fight, knowing it’s a lost battle?

 

Now what?

Should I pick up the pieces?

Or should I DANCE on them and watch the colours unfurl!

 

Now what?

Are you going to just WATCH as I bare myself, moment by moment, piece by piece, one by one, to one and all?

Aren’t you going to stop me? Slap me? Shake me from my trance?

Do you delight in my reverie?

 

Now what, sweetheart?

Now what?

Is there no beginning after this end?

There should be, the stories say so,

Legend says so

History isn’t going to REPEAT itself?

 

But mama made me believe…

And I believed. Sadly, I still do.

This is going to CHANGE, right darling?

You’ll wake up any moment now,

Abandon your grave and hug me tight?

 

I can’t hear you.

You’re scaring me!

Don’t joke with me anymore!

Just SPEAK to me once baby,

Tell me love…

Now What?


You’re beautiful

"Dialog"  Rudolf Bonvie. 1977.

You’re so beautiful.
And you deserve so much better.
And even though I miss you,
I’m happy for you and this new life you’ve chosen.

But I’m selfish and sad.
And you being beautiful just makes it all the more insufferable.

Why do you have to be so beautiful?

Heiner Luepke.

 


Living Or Dying

Lucy Reynolds.

 

 

Every moment counts,

Every word,

Every touch,

Every promise,

Every breath counts.

 

Enjoy it while it lasts.

 

Life and its uncertainties…

You can never tell

This mystery is some vulgar, beautiful, wretchedness,

We have got to endure.

 

Loving empties us within.

 

We forget that we’re losing strength

We forget that it’s robbing us of our sanity

But we give in any way,

Just for those few stolen moments of bliss.

 

Temptation. Yes, we’re tempted to enjoy the temporary glory.

 

Forgetting the eternal damnation we are calling upon ourselves.

 

Life. Love. Misery.

 

I know not of any other way of living,

Or dying.